Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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