At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize