You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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