Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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