you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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