considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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