what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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