Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
