I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
