he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
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