how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize