i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize