You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
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I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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