East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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