I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
