took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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