I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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