Christians are straight up FREAKS
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
