Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
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i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
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He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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