i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
