you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
It was like getting head from an anaconda
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
21 Texts That Prove All the Magic Happens in Parking Lots
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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