I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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