what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
