so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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