So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
