I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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