But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
