Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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