are you still at the devil's house?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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