My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
