We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
