Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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