i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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