He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
