Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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