Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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