Whod you bang
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Couch. On fire.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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