Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
worst night to have a conscience
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
