grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize