and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
