that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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