mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
