I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
