As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
