i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
