So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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