NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
