you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
