You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
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