my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize