Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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