were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
